Yahoo Finance Overcome Fears to Do Better at Work
We don't expect to feel afraid when we walk in the doors of our office, yet some research shows that a surprising number of people do. That fear can come in a number of forms, from not feeling comfortable to express opinions, to being hesitant to take risks or experiment to find the best solutions.
Employees may fear being punished or humiliated if they do what others perceive to be the wrong thing, or in worst-case scenarios, being retaliated against by their bosses or employers through mistreatment on the job. They may even fear being fired.
Many employees also dread going to work for fear of being bullied or harassed by co-workers or supervisors. Such instances are not as rare as you might think; according to the Workplace Bullying Institute, as many as one-third of employees may be victimized by bullies in the office, and about 20 percent of that bullying can be defined as harassment.
How can we change these disturbing statistics? Much of the onus rests on employers, who need to take steps to create what Aaron Skonnard, CEO of Pluralsight, has termed a "no-fear culture." These steps might include implementing ways to measure the performance of systems rather than people and encouraging people to share candid feedback without fear of reprisal.
In some cases, there are things individuals can do as well to overcome fear that may be hindering their work performance. If your fear is based primarily on apprehension about stepping out of your comfort zone rather than facing harassment, for example, you can take steps to tap into a quality of fearlessness to reach your full potential.
Gail Sheehy, author of 17 books, including the bestselling classic "Passages" and her recent memoir "Daring: My Passages," recently spoke on this topic at the Lead On Watermark Silicon Valley Conference for Women. At the conference, which was keynoted by former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton, Sheehy shared with the audience how she had to overcome her own fear, starting in the 1960s, to break into the field as a woman journalist.
In an exclusive interview, Sheehy shared the following five secrets of how women (and men as well) can learn to master fear to achieve their full potential in their career and life:
1. Understand common fears. Women in particular face a number of common fears that may hold them back if they don't recognize what they are and take steps to overcome them. The "imposter syndrome" is one such challenge that many women face -- especially young women. But Sheehy explains that you don't have to feel confident to act confident.
"It's the most important acting job you can learn," she says. "Men do it all the time. Recent studies of the brain and gender differences in the workplace agree that acting confidently is the surest key to success." To this end, she says steps such as taking an acting class or getting a public speaking coach can be well worth the investment.
2. Outgrow your fear of self-promotion. Another challenge many women face is worrying that if they ask for a raise, they'll be penalized for being too aggressive. Sheehy suggests catapulting over this fear by preparing an iron-clad case that proves why you deserve the salary bump before you have a discussion with your boss about it.
"List your accomplishments," she says. "Tie them to saving time, increasing sales, pacifying a difficult client, etc. Talk about what you can contribute in the future. Make your supervisor salivate over the creative, hardworking, loyal player you are!"
3. Ditch the perfectionism. Some women with an entrepreneurial bent may fear they can't launch a new business until they can lay out each and every step to their goal before they pitch investors. This, unfortunately, is why many business startups by women stay small and don't reach the big leagues, according to Sheehy. Instead of falling back on perfectionistic habits, she reminds women that no one can be expected to detail all the steps when first envisioning a new enterprise.
"Investors are much more likely to be excited by a big vision, something that could change the world, than a modest idea that might not even need their money," she says. "Women need to dare to think big, but go step by step in articulating the vision and strategy to scale up the business."
4. Choose a mentor -- and then woo him or her. While many women recognize the value in finding a mentor to help guide them through challenging times and facilitate the transition to become more daring, they may not understand the best way to make the relationship work. Sheehy suggests brainstorming what you can offer in return for your mentor's investment of coaching and belief in you, like providing offsite research, ideas or social media assistance.
"Margaret Mead offered herself as my mentor when I took a course from her and let her know that I wrote for New York magazine," Sheehy says. "She invited me to ride with her to and from Columbia University so she could excite me with ideas for stories of cultural change that she wanted to see portrayed from a young woman's point of view."
5. Learn to swap fear for daring. While Sheehy admits she hasn't been fearless in every challenging situation and has seldom met women who have, she recognizes that being fearful of trying something new or risky made her feel worse than jumping in. Therefore, she developed a habit that, when she felt fear, she would dare herself to push through it and do what needed to be done.
"To dare risk jumping out of your comfort zone changes the way people respond to you," she says. "That changes the way you see yourself. Even when I didn't land on my feet at first -- which was often -- I learned something useful and dared to try again. The only way out of fear is through."
Robin Madell has spent over two decades as a corporate writer, journalist, and communications consultant on business, leadership and career issues. She serves as a copywriter, speechwriter and ghostwriter for executives and entrepreneurs across diverse industries, including finance, technology, healthcare, law, real estate, advertising and marketing. Robin has interviewed over 1,000 thought leaders around the globe and has won 20 awards for editorial excellence. She has served on the Board of Directors of the Healthcare Businesswomen's Association in both New York and San Francisco, and contributed to the book "Be Your Own Mentor: Strategies from Top Women on the Secrets of Success," published by Random House. Robin is also the author of "Surviving Your Thirties: Americans Talk About Life After 30" and co-author of "The Strong Principles: Career Success." Connect with her on LinkedIn or follow her on Twitter: @robinmadell.
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